Thursday, October 28, 2010

Addendum

After sharing my official A-List, it occurred to me that it was a pretty general and safe list, and there are many interestingly random things about the opposite sex that I consider green lights or deal breakers. These things really have no rhyme or reason, I just get an immediate "That's hot" or "That's a no go" reaction. And so, I thought it'd be fun to share them. 

A-List Addendum: 

Pets. If he's a pet person, lives with pets, wants pets,  grew up with pets - I'm not sure where it's gonna go. I haven't really run into this problem yet but I know it would become an issue. I mean, don't get me wrong I like animals, but don't get me wrong, I don't want them in my house; stinking up my furniture, taking all my money, whimpering at the foot of my bed, pooping in my shoes. I'll pass. I remember someone once telling me "That's very Dominican of you." Well hey, my Dad had plastic on the living room furniture, so what can I say? [He was doing the most with those white couches and a full house though!] Do I think pets are on the same level as humans? Absolutely not. Do they deserve love and adequate care? Of course. They just won't be getting it from me, in my damn house! 

Basketball. If I find out a guy plays ball and plays it well, I am ready to go like yesterday. And after my hot flash is over, I'll usually ask them if I can watch them play sometime. [Is that weird?] Why this is, I don't know. I can't play basketball in the slightest and I don't know any of the technical terms beyond a lay-up but lawd knows I'll sit there and watch a whole game in anticipation. Anticipation for what you may ask? *Shrug* All I know is that the combo of fit men of the cinnamon and chocolate variety running around all fast [possibly shirtless], while being all aggressive and gazelle-like gets me instantly giddy and sweating like a whore in church. 

Flip flops. Like my enemies and full on coitus, I feel as though a man's feet are something I should not see in public. So flip-flops and other sandal-like footwear are to be banned from my ideal man's arsenal. Now if he has nice feet, I might feel differently, and will deal with that on a case by case basis. For the record, I have very nice feet. 

Freaks. This is actually a turn off. There's nothing that makes my stomach turn faster than when a man has yet to learn my last name yet wants to know of my sexual preferences. Stop being a pervert!  If a man tells me he's a freak and would do anything once, I'm turned off. Because as with all things, I think one should be balanced, and everyone should have a limit. A guy who says he's a freak and acts like it all the time just makes me think he's the kind of person who would let a dog lick his balls because - hey, why not?  Yuck. Also, what is the point in telling me you think I'm a freak... Like I'm just supposed to lean in your ear and whisper "That's because I am" reassuring wink and all? Why is my perceived sexual prowess up for discussion in the first 10 minutes?

And this last one, I am torn on... A guy who likes to shop. I mean, I think shopping well and often goes hand in hand with being stylish, and a stylish man is a sought after man. But I can't help feeling a little funny if he happens to have more shoes than me. Or if he knows more about diamonds and cashmere and thread counts than me. *side eye* At that point I'm kinda like "Aren't you supposed to be watching the game?! Or chopping up some wood or something? Gah dam."

Gender roles for the win y'all.

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Be succinct and keep it classy :)