Monday, December 27, 2010

Switchin' it up

I'd usually go for vanilla but in the future I guess I'll pick the brown one *sigh*

This morning I tweeted: I'm starting to realize that my standards may be limiting me. All junk can continue to stay out of my life but I am welcoming more beauty. I'm realizing that maybe, if I get out of my own way sometimes, I may just be pleasantly surprised.

I've been bored lately and it's because I've been having the same experiences. And I've been having a déjà vu period because I've been limiting myself to the same choices.

Something I noticed about the most stylish women, whether they're ones I personally know or fashion bloggers, is the lack of discrimination when it comes to the places they peruse for clothing. They shop at every type of store from high end to low end, knowing that there's always a possibility they'll find something they like. I've seen Chloe Conspiracy detail an outfit photo, and the dress components will be anything from Christian Louboutin to Charlotte Russe. I'm the type to avoid certain stores because "they're just not my style". But this isn't really about fashion, this is about life. I go to the same 5 clubs, the same 10 stores, the same few neighborhoods - all because I know what I like and those other things I don't do aren't my "thing". But if I'm so confident in what I like and who I am, would a few new experiences change that? Hell to the naw.

Friday, December 24, 2010


I was doing my usual perusing on twitter today when the words "White Girl Wasted" caught my eye from a random, colorful profile. I skimmed her bio which stated "Everyones a rapper- what a coincidence! So am I." I immediately decided "MUST PEEP!" and clicked through to her site, hoping for the best. Well, homegirl delivered.

Her name is ElleMC, she's 24 years old and hails from the West Coast. She raps, sings, skateboards, fancies gold jewelry and most importantly, writes her own shit. She's a bonafide hustler, working odd jobs since the age of 12, and says she was raised as a hippie, with no TV and little money.

Not only does she know her stuff [her influences range from people I've heard of: TLC, Tupac, MC Lyte, NWA, House of Pain, Madonna, ACDC, Guns n' Roses, OutKast, Ice Cube and Bone Thugs N Harmony; to artists I've never listened to: Yelawolf, Duane Peters, USBOMB, Goodie Mob, Andre Nickatina and Dead Prez], but her song "Pickin Up Stixx" is getting mad play in my real and imaginary world, where I'm cruising through Cali with the top down and pimp juice in my hair.

The title is another way of saying "Handling business". I'm with it. Especially since I honestly cannot get "Haters on a plate, naw playa I just ate" and "If you eat at my house, you best wash ya dishes" out of my head. CANNOT.

After stepping into a studio for the first time 8 months ago, ElleMC says she'll be releasing her EP "Lurk" within the next week. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all y'all. Don't say I never gave you anything.

Check out more from ElleMC at:, as well as her Twitter and Youtube Channel. Let's also give a shout to the producers, Jared Telliano and Terminill.

Big thanks to ElleMC herself for her cooperation =)

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

10 days

...until it's a whole new year. Wow.

Well, it feels like it's been a long time since you've heard from me. I presume I've been busy! But I wanted to get a real hearty post in before the New Year. I feel like I owe it to y'all.

So. The past few weeks have been... delightful. I quit my "job" exactly two weeks ago. To sum it up quickly; I was growing exasperated with the prospect of spending another six months in monotony, and making petty cash all while continuing to put my career aspirations on the back burner. For just a job. [Job - from urban dictionary - A futile effort for financial independence, social acceptance and personal happiness.] So I abruptly quit, and 10 days later I received a paycheck from my new gig. Yes, a few days after resignation I scored a marketing position for an up and coming graphic apparel line. It involves blogging and partying and exercising some of my best talents so I'm a smitten paid kitten. Luckily my business partner is a proponent of the DIY lifestyle*, freelancing and making your own rules, so we get along swimmingly. Some people were a little worried about me, but let's not forget... I'm a muthafucking G.

My creative juices are free-flowing madly with all that I have planned for the coming year... BlueShame will get to see more of me, and I will also be introducing plenty of my friends! Photo shoots, designs, interviews with raw talent, my personal poetry, and ART ART ART all served fresh on the 2011 platter. Woo!!! I'm very nervous and very excited - when I think about all that is to come, High School butterflies start fluttering around in my stomach. Also Gaga releases a new album in the Spring so hellooo, it's fittin' to be a good year. Anyway, I'd settle for nothing less. It's the usual over here. Just loving life and trying to take things to the next level as always.

In other news, I've discovered a new-found love in twitter. It doesn't replace my love of blogging, but it sure is nice to fill in gaps in blog posts with a little something something. My brain is whizzing and whirling  all the time and I'm always thinking interesting little thoughts, so it's nice to have a place where all my rambling silliness is welcome. I'm following like 3 dozen people and have about 50 more than that following me... I'm kind of picky with who I follow. My "timeline" is currently full of funny,  positive and intelligent  people and I'd like to avoid having a bunch of nonsense on my screen. You're probably thinking 'It's not that serious', but I'm the kind of lady that cuts people off for having no social graces [ie: having their nose in their phone 24/7]. In other words you better bring your a-game or you won't be included in Blue's world. I only want to be surrounded by the best of the best, and that includes people. ["I only rock with the best of them and could care less about the rest of them" - thanks Drey!] But I digress! I'm a snob, I know. Anyway, if any of you are cool tweeters, give me a holla.

Strangers still love to randomly start conversations with me. And if they aren't all that creepy, I will engage them for my own amusement. I should really start recording my interactions with them here. From the suited up man who sat next to me on the train just to exclaim "Wow, those are some hot tights!" to the email I received from some nerd challenging me to an "Intelligence duel", my chit chats with new people are truly priceless. There was also a man who stopped me on the street to breathlessly ask me what I put in my hair because it looks so healthy. I cannot be making this up, if I were it would involve beach houses in Aruba and sponsored Bloomingdales shopping sprees, ya dig?

I had to get over a little crush recently. He was dope but it wasn't heading towards a better place at the time so I chose to dead it. What helped me put things in perspective were these two quotes "When your heart is broken, hustle harder, it will help you forget the pain" and "Do not chase people who are not open to love, go where the love is." [Both from twitter!] My heart wasn't broken, and it was nowhere near close to love, but the gist of the quotes stuck, and I closed my door and began to hustle. I took all that bountiful loving energy and applied it to something else, something worthwhile, and my dreams are coming together. Isn't that amazing?!

I think it is.

*I wrote that. Duh.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Walk of Fame

I've never been crazy about celebrities - but here are the three I'd love to know in real life someday:

I love the look - playful and masculine, but classy
She certainly inspired me to go for short hair
Look at those legs!
 Victoria Beckham: She's such a damn lady. I didn't pay her much attention back during her Spice Girl days [where my "favorite" fluctuated from every spice other than Ginger] but she caught my eye recently as a stylish and classy role model type public figure. She has great taste and is a seemingly happy wife and mother, who handles fame graciously by maintaining a self deprecating sense of humor and a gracious and grateful attitude. That wins in my book!

The sum of all things

This is truly how I live my life, and I couldn't have said it better myself.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Night Sounds

"Many Times" by Esthero and Miguel.

Ahhh this song. This song has been on repeat in my cozy crib for the past four hours. I love duets that just work [for example, Alicia Keys and Usher on "My Boo" did not work]... but this one certainly does. I adore when they both sing the line "I tend to myself... if neeed be." Amazing. Miguel's silky sweet voice might just become my new favorite [up there with Huey Dunbar from DLG and Tony Rich and numerous others]. As an aside, doesn't Esthero just look like she's full of loving, glowing, gorgeous, goodness up there? Sheesh. Always loved her.

I love when people deliver on their promises. It's like, you want to call yourself a singer? Then sang! Wanna call yourself an artist? Then make beautiful things.


Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Laws IV

I thought I would never finish this! Here is the last segment of my 48 Laws of Power review.

Law 37
Create Compelling Spectacles
Striking imagery and grand symbolic gestures create the aura of power – everyone responds to them.  Stage spectacles for those around you, then full of arresting visuals and radiant symbols that heighten your presence.  Dazzled by appearances, no one will notice what you are really doing.

I accomplish much by having a mean walk indeed.

Law 38
Think as you like but Behave like others
If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and that you look down upon them.  They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior.  It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness.

Weird. Strange. Odd. "Special". These are the pet names I've been called by people who didn't understand my unconventional [yet genius] way of thinking. I learned quickly that if you are the slightest bit different, some will never let you forget it, and a rare few will see the beauty in it. What's hilarious to me is that I know I'm not the weird one. This law is kind of interesting because I found that I unconsciously began to follow it. After a few rounds of commonfolk not getting my jokes or following my train of thought, I decided to limit my genius to the people I knew would understand... my friends and my blog readers. You can share your originality with whomever you like, but I hope you also like feeling awkward and explaining yourself.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Solid Gold Gaga

So Madame Tussauds decided Lady Gaga was relevant enough to have her likeness enshrined in wax. Duh. The process took four months to complete, and our fair lady was cloned, not once, but eight times! The figures were unveiled late last week in 8 different cities: New York, London, Vegas, Amsterdam, Berlin,  Shanghai, Hong Kong and Hollywood. 

I think they did a pretty good job. Here are my favorite looks, from: 


Saturday, December 11, 2010

Friday, December 10, 2010

The Pursuit

I met a pretty awesome woman last week while having dinner with my sister at Pastis. She arrived alone which I thought was pretty bad ass, and she was sat right beside us. For no particular reason, I couldn't stop looking at her. On my way back from the bathroom, I saw that she and my sister had begun chatting and a few minutes later she knew a little bit about us and we knew a little about her. She's an entrepreneur and life coach whose show Celebrity Life Coach premiered on the Biography channel that same evening. She gave me her card, I promised to email her and when I went home, did just that and then eagerly googled her. I found her Huffington Post article which I want to share with my readers, since it echoes the constant "follow your dreams" advice I always spew here at BlueShame!

When was the last time you dreamed? I'm talking about dreaming and achieving something that you really want in your life. I bet when you were younger you dreamed all the time, but something happened and it didn't turn out. That's probably when you slowly gave up on dreaming. Or maybe you're one of those people who achieved your dreams and didn't bother to create new ones. Or you're in the large pool of people who never really dreamed at all. Don't worry. That's common. Often people get busy in their daily lives and forget to dream. Or they're afraid to dream because it brings up lots of emotions that put them at risk for being hurt or disappointed. It's comfortable to live without emotional risk, but that's not where the fun is in life. Having dreams engages you in your life, makes it more exciting, and connects you to yourself and what's important to you.

The dreams you pursue should be attainable and based on ideas that totally excite you. It's important that you make sure you are creating dreams for you and not what you think you should do or achieve. Dreams are what you really want for yourself. And it's important that you formulate your dreams in language such that you believe that they are possible to achieve.

One obstacle that you may encounter as you go after your dreams is cynicism, which may rear its ugly head with thoughts like, "I'm not talented or smart enough," "That's way too hard," or, "I can't afford it." Negative thoughts are excuses and need to be ignored. They are just keeping you from your dreams. It's your actions that make things happen. Connect with people you know and ask for a favor, a loan or an opportunity for something. One phone call to the right person can change everything.

Our actions follow our thoughts. Your actions must be consistent with your dream or you won't achieve it. For example, if you want a healthy, fit body but you're eating pizza four times a week, you're actions are not consistent with your dream. Another example would be if you want to be a chef but don't sign up for a cooking class that is offered in your area. It's all up to you. Your actions are the fulfillment of your dreams, and through your heartfelt dreams you can make lasting change in your life.

Life is about having real dreams that are special to you and going after them. As a life coach, I'm here to help you to figure out what you want in your life and start dreaming again. It's the first step to creating a whole new life for yourself.

Read the full article by Lauren Zander here.

Thursday, December 9, 2010


Cute pic. From Chanel... and that's about all I know. 

I talked about my A-List, so I shall now run through my B-List. I was totally gonna name this post "Boats and Ships", a play on friends being in your same boat and friendships but it sounded too reminiscent of sailing [which I know nothing about] and worse, it sounded corny. So it was inevitably chucked.


One thing I took with me from my religious days was the verse at 1 Corinthians 15:33: "Do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character." I have heard little that is truer, and it's something I've held dear to my heart as I entered the ever interesting social scene of New York City.

As a self proclaimed socialite, I think it's safe to say that I've met a lot of people. I've toned the friendly eagerness down lately but over the years I've befriended lots of folks and also kicked lots to the curb. As a matter fact, my haters probably make up most of my readership. Love y'all! But although I've made a lot of friends and acquaintances, it's always difficult to find and keep good and close friends. Best friends, if you will.

I always had a thing for Ms. Evangelista *swoon*

Mutual understanding, respect and admiration are the basis of any good friendship; and humor, common interests and proximity are the sweet, sweet icing. But there are other things that really make a friendship, that allow it to grow, things that sustain it. At least for me. So here are some words on what I find special and unique, and worthy of my friendship:

I think a vital part of friendship is keeping in touch and making time to see each other. I have certainly cut people off for failing to keep in touch, especially in the initial stages.  If someone generally doesn't have time to see how I'm doing and can't seem to make time to spend with me - well then, snip snip!!! Now this isn't to say that I don't understand that people are busy. Sometimes my close friends and I won't speak for weeks at a time, but it's fine because we have years of friendship to back us. And sometimes I fail at this because I suffer from tunnel vision, and get immersed in all the little inconsequential details of my life, so much so, that for weeks at a time, the outside world becomes nonexistent to me. I'm working on it. So I'm aware that we're all busy. But I do feel that you can always make time for the people you care about. I know I come across high maintenance in that regard, but ask me if I care.

I like people who are intelligent, logical and moving forward in their lives. It's wonderful to talk about ideas and concepts and having that extra dose of motivation. I could never really deal with people who sit around being wacks all day. Not my thing.

Kind hearts and good souls are always endearing to me. I'm a kind person, as my good friend once put it "a kind person who's bad side I'd never want to get on", but kind nonetheless. Folks with chips on their shoulders and unresolved issues need not apply.  I'm the type of person who will welcome you into my home, feed you, accommodate you; basically just make sure you're warm and happy and satisfied - no pun intended. I think nothing of favors, certainly don't mind sharing, and often think of any other ways I could be of some assistance. I need friends who reflect that and appreciate that, lest we both get taken advantage of elsewhere.

A friend gets anointed a true ride or dier when I realize they really have my back. I must be able to trust you around my things [I have some nice thangs], around a significant other, and around my family. I must know that you will have my back if I, perchance,  have to scrap with some broad at the club. These things are rare but no one wants to get caught ill prepared at a time like that. Be a person of integrity and strong character and you will have my vote for life.

[Edit: Oh, and let's not forget star quality. If you're wondering what that is and if you have it... you don't.]

And I think for now, that's it.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010


I wrote this a few days ago, and although it doesn't represent what I'm feeling in this exact moment, it's an accurate account of the fear that sometimes creeps in. *Cue Sarah McLachlan's "Fear"*

Time flies. And the truth is, even if just a little bit, that scares me.

I'm going to be 23 in 6 months and I just feel like, oh my god my twenties are flying. It doesn't help when every other person woman you meet is like "If I could be your age again..."

I live with this constant, subtle fear of not doing enough with my time, not pushing, exploring, feeling, experiencing enough.

I want to live, and live a full life.

And by so many accounts I do... I've worked hard and I've carved out something great and special for myself in this city. I really do live a charmed life and despite the irregular occurrence of gnats and scrapes, each year it has only gotten more splendid.

But is it normal to constantly crave more? A guy I once knew told me that it seems like I'm never satisfied. I fear that there's truth in that as well.

You guys know the drill, you know my dreams, my goals, my desires, I talk about them here all the time. Some are simple, some are grand - and all are possible.

And I know I play with possibility... but I think sometimes I get caught up in the details, I get caught up in my feelings, I get caught up in my head. And worst of all, I worry.

I worry that I won't achieve my version of greatness. I worry that my corner of fulfillment will be swept away somehow.

And that, my friends, is what ends up stopping my efforts.

The crippling fear of, what if this doesn't work out?

Also my self-diagnosed ADD.

But I digress.

Maybe I need therapy.

Or maybe I need to get a fucking grip, realize it's all in my head and push go muthafucka!

I'm heavily leaning towards the latter.

Pain for my sham friends, and champagne for my real friends. [25th Hour!] And to my ambitious comrades? I'll see y'all at the top where the gettin looks good, and our current worries will be replaced by diamond encrusted ones.

The Hard Way

Via PostSecret

These are the countless things I have had to learn the hard way. And things that I also, know for sure:

Don't put aluminum in the microwave.

Bring a copy of your resume to the job interview. Be prepared.

It's always better to be overdressed than under dressed.

When going out on the town, always have a plan B. And cab money.

A man will always try to get his way. [Don't let him.]

Listen to your gut.

Organized religion is opium for the masses.

A man's actions towards a woman often speak louder than his words.

Any deal involving the exchange of money should be put in writing.

If there is no one who can do it like you, better to do it alone.

You cannot flourish in an environment that makes you unhappy.

When first getting to know someone, never give more than you receive.

Unhappy people will bring happy people down with them. And along the same lines: Insecure people will never stop resenting confident ones.

A change of pace and a fresh perspective will brighten your mood.

You know what's best for you, the hardest part is following it.

A female friend who doesn't have many other female friends, and who seems to value the friendship of men above all others, will probably try to steal your man.

Certain personalities cannot have roommates. If you like things to be clean and organized, want to play your music as loud as you want and have friends over whenever you want, then you should live alone. I hated feeling like I had to be "on" even at home, and worse, I hated feeling like I had to answer to someone in my house [A house is not a home!], especially when I never thought I was being unreasonable.

If you do have roommates, don't let the person who's never cleaned/cooked/dogsat before, clean/cook/dogsit without first pulling out the powerpoint. That's yo shit too!

Only let people borrow your shitty stuff. Again, that's yo shit!

You being the first one to ever tell someone about themselves will probably result in them getting all butthurt/cutting you off. This is the chance you take!

If your friends don't know each other, keep them apart. This really isn't something I had to learn the hard way, I just kinda think it's better in the long run.

Don't mix different types of alcohol.

In dating and relationships, pace yourself. There's no harm in doing that, but much harm in doing the opposite.

You should probably look at your itinerary before you end up at the wrong airport and spend another 30 minutes driving to the correct one across town and in traffic. What up Cali!

Don't keep your experimental, semi-nude artsy pics in the same folder with your regular pics, because you will end up sending them by mistake to a guy who you see as nothing more than a friend. He will get the wrong idea and keep the photo as "blackmail" until your sister threatens his life and he promises to delete it. You will never forgive him. I'm just sayin'.

Listen to them when they say "I'm not looking for a relationship. You're too good for me. I'm very busy. I'm not a good communicator." And run when they say "I have a girlfriend. Is your friend/sister/*insert female with close relationship to you* cute? I only cheated because *insert whatever asinine reason they think excuses them from such selfish behavior*"

Research your doctor and ask plenty of questions. Take your time. Or you'll end up $10,000 poorer with the same initial problem.

Pay attention to what your body is telling you. The easiest/fastest/most effective/only way to get to know who you truly are is by paying attention to the signs your body naturally gives you. When you do A, B, or C does your stomach tighten? Or do you feel loose and relaxed? Once you've figured that out, you need to ask yourself more questions. Why do I feel nervous? Or why do I feel calm? The answers to those questions give you glimpses into that you like, what makes you comfortable, and ultimately, who you truly are. It's all very primal but extremely important.

Stop explaining yourself. Do not continue dealing with people who don't want to change. Stop trying to help people who won't help themselves. You can only say your piece so often before you start to go down yourself.

Don't let anyone tell you that you can't achieve your idea of success. Usually the people who tell you this have told themselves this, and it's safe to say that they're usually not in an upstanding position.

The most rewarding things in life are hard to attain. Sometimes they are blood, sweat and tears hard. But they are so incredibly worth it.

Don't waste time.

Choose your friends wisely.

You will always fall, but you must dust yourself off and you must keep chugging.

No one is responsible for YOUR LIFE but YOU. Your life includes your environment, your mood, your people, your failures and your successes. Do not EVER be mistaken. The second you are mistaken is the second you begin to falter.

Remember to be smart and learn things the easy way... through others.