Saturday, February 26, 2011

Over it: Social Networking Edition

This is the Over it: Social Networking Edition. We all use twitter and facebook and myspace and whatever the heck else is out there for various asinine reasons that keep us glued to our screens. But as with everything, social networking has its downsides. Here are some of my personal pet peeves - and while you're at it, follow me on twitter & tumblr, become a fan of BlueShame on facebook, or just continuing reading this here blog. Thank you for the support!

The fame-whores:
The over-styled, over-tanned, and generally overdone "models" and their ilk [see: homies] with 5000 friends/followers who post dozens and dozens of trampy, ill-advised glamour shots of themselves in various settings [club, "studio", messy bedroom] in the hopes of getting tons of comments, accolades and "OMGZ ure so prettii/hawt" proclamations in return. The worst part is when they actually receive these coveted replies and don't even have the good sense to say thank you. How dare you whore yourself out like that and not even have the decency to thank your fans for the opportunity! Ungrateful and opportunistic? Oh hell naw. Do me a favor and go play in traffic. As an aside, these are often the girls who run around claiming they're so unique and special and nobody can fuck with them when the reality is, they are no different from the next blank-head barbie [a Lady Blue original!] claiming the same thing. They usually have a boyfriend who they love so much [read: doormat who spoils her and lets her get away with murder] or they've had so much guy trouble that they are now a "lesbian". If it's a fame-whoring male, 9 times out of 10 he's a homosexual. A flaming one. BeBe, voluminous hair, pink drinks, spandex, Hello Kitty, any kind of platform heel and Chelly's "I took the night" are usually amongst their favorite things.

The sluts:
I see this phenomenon occurring most often in the young female community. She's got everything out that her momma gave her with streamers tassels covering her nipples, edible underwear covering her ill na na, and approximately 5 lbs of MAC makeup covering her grill. She usually lets people call her "female" and refers to other women as such *shudder*. Her statuses often consist of nothing more than overly sexualized NC17 double entendre laced heathenry that makes a lady like me wanna go to church, say a prayer and throw some holy water on the bitch in heat. Then I wanna hold her head under water [after I make her take a cold shower] until she says uncle. Usually the only relatives name a girl like that knows how to scream is "Daddy". [#DamnItsTrue.] Put some clothes on your cooter and close your mouth. Something doesn't always have to be coming out of it or going in it! I'm just sayin though.

People who confuse social networking sites for Match dot com:
Now I'm not knockin anybody trynna get their swerve on, I have been known to send a "SHIT YOU CUTE" message to a fella once or twice or much more often than that but my beef comes from the people who treat it solely as a dating service. Like the online version of parking lot pimpin, or those dudes who go to the mall just to bag girls [or a stripper working extra hard for that tip... *shrug]. These people will spend their online days whining and complaining that they haven't met the man/woman of their dreams or how all men/women suck yet the individual's wall/timeline is full of empty flirtations with dozens of people of the opposite/same sex. #HoSitDown. Or there's the people who immediately after adding/following you, send over a risqué proposition like "You trynna fuck?" Who could ever turn such a thing down? I know I can't... I just hit the block button.

The people drenched in snarky remarks and self-deprecation:
Shoutout to all the broads and lames attempting to hide their blatant dissatisfaction with themselves and their mediocre lives misery with sarcasm. I see you and you're not fooling anybody. Your excessive statuses about crying yourself to sleep are not assuaged because you attached a mere haha to the end of your 5 message long tirade. I mean hey, I guess it's cool you can make a joke but man, just get help. And stay off the internet in the meantime.

Things that make me feel like "O_o" or say “Oh... Okay.”:
-People who will log on just to tell everyone not to hit them up. #Killyourself.
-People who post that they're upset and when you ask what's wrong they say “I don't want to talk about it.”
-People who are constantly calling someone out/subtweeting. Call me sensational, but I put names all up in that bitch. Get at me.
-Religious posts. Is facebook really the place for almighty praises? I thought Church was for all o dat. And that is why I don't go.
-People who are “single”, “in a relationship”, “single”, “it's complicated” in a matter of a week. It damn sure is complicated, ain't it?
-People who update the world on their every single move. After you went to the bathroom, did you scratch your ass too? Cool.
-Posting the same photo taken from a zillion angles in a zillion different ways. We get it. You had a good hair day/new outfit or whatever. Relax.

If I missed anything, rest assure I'll catch it in my next installment.

Pretty Young Thing

Do you think I wake up looking this gorgeous? Well I do. But I love "putting on a face" anyway. I love makeup and skin and hair products and even have a sizable stash of shit which is a strong indicator that I'm indeed American. I'm not a specialist or some youtube guru but I do like spending a pathetic amount of time mindlessly perusing the marketing traps cosmetics at Duane Reade and Space Nk. I have probably used 100+ products from 30+ brands and these are the winners. I am not easily impressed, most products DO NOT deliver and I am particular. A lot of these products are personal diehard favorites and others are products I use that I think you ladies should know about.

-Giorgio Armani Luminous Silk Foundation: clean, easy, slightly dewy and they have my color [#8] which is a major feat. Runner up: Sonia Kashuk perfecting luminous foundation [I mix bamboo with a dab of camel, which unfortunately are the two darkest shades].
-As for blush, I love Mark's cameo glo on me and have about 4 different Stila convertible colors! I know those don't work for everyone so I also recommend MAC and NARS [I use amour and oasis] who have excellent powdered blushes and wide ranges of shades.
-So for lip color I'm a total 13 year old. I really like Mark's glow baby glow glosses and Bath and Body Works Liplicious [I have almost all the shades/flavors]. I like peachy corals, dusty pinks, and berry lip tones. Fresh also makes some bad-ass glosses that smell citrus-y, are pigmented and not at all sticky [which is my preference, that's why I don't rock with MAC].

-Derma E vanilla cleansing mousse is so soothing and gentle on my combination skin that turns pretty dry during the colder months. I use Mark That's Deep for summer and a deeper clean [ie: makeup removal].
-C. Booth daily detoxifying enzyme pads are just marvelous for toning. No messiness and they really do work. For a stronger [and pricier] toning treatment, I love MD Skincare's Alpha Beta daily face peel packets.
-C. Booth's antioxidant oil-free moisturizer is perfect for me during summer. For winter I need something heavier and since I love double duty moisturizers, I use Derma E vitamin a retinyl palmitate cream. I want to switch to the vitamin a one with green tea once I'm done with this one though, only because it sounds better. Both brands are great, effective and affordable and I highly suggest you check them out.
-I LOVE Korres lip butter in Jasmine for a basic lip treatment. It sinks in wonderfully and makes my lips so silky smooth. Honorable mention: Eos vanilla bean lip balm stick. [Both are natural.]

-Garnier Herbashine has worked well for me for a slight change in hair color. It's supposedly natural and fairly easy to use.
-Good things to have: a pair of Tweezerman tweezers, a sturdy metal blackhead remover, flat cotton pads, Simple eye makeup remover [so gentle and non oily!], Evian mini face misters - I don't know why, but these are necessary.
-Tired of ruining all your white tees with your sweaty underarms? Try Tom's of Maine deodorant, it's aluminum free and will help you avoid those yellow pit stains.
-Ecotools brushes are cheap and the softest makeup brushes I've ever ever used. You will love them! Promise. Sonia Kashuk brushes are a step below but also affordable.

-I sometimes use C. Booth's Apple Microdermabrasion Scrub on my body even though it's meant for your face. It's creamy yet kinda rough, smells wonderful [exactly like a green apple] and definitely does the job.
-C. Booth original bath and body oil is amazing [I use it after a shower], it smells like soft sweet heaven and sinks in quickly.
-The Body Shop Brazil Nut Body Butter: I die for the mild chocolate scent, plus it's super hydrating. See also: Skinmilk Body Cream and Korres Guava Body Butter [which smells amazing]. C. Booth also has an AHA body lotion that is pretty great for smoothing scaly/bumpy skin [C. Booth Alpha Hydroxy Acid maximum moisture daily body lotion].
-I like atypical fragrances, ones that smell like a motley of freshness, sexiness and yumminess - but more importantly, ones that knock you right on your ass because they smell so damn good. Comptoir Sud Pacifique Vanille Extreme/Vanille Peach [couldn't pick just one!] are to die for if you are looking for a true and powerful vanilla scent. Also swoonworthy: Auric Blends Egyptian Princess Oil, Banana Republic's Rosewood, Lolita Lempicka, Mark Jewel, Gap The Artist, and Lilu, although I'm unsure if they make the last two anymore *sad face*.
-Nail polish - I like Essie and OPI - as for shades I like an array of pale nudes, bloody reds and bright corals and pinks for summer. I also have a lot of purple polish which is good at anytime of the year. Top 5 favorite shades are: Essie's Fiji [an opaque pale pink], Stepp'n out [a sheertone baby pink], lilacism [an opaque cool-toned pale lavender], A-List [a bloody red] and OPI's Parlez-vous OPI?
-I always need hand cream because I hate for my hands to feel dry. If for some reason I don't have any hand cream available after I wash my hands, I will ask a stranger. Yes, it is that serious. I love Eucerin calming hand creme because it's thick yet sinks in quickly and is odorless.

-I have curly hair that is soft, fine, and easy to manage but leans toward the dry side. I prefer creams because they tame frizz and define my curl but don't leave my hair crispy. Bumble & Bumble grooming creme/Leave-in rinse out conditioner are fantastic for doing just this. For a drugstore version, I adore Garnier Leave in conditioning cream. It has never done me wrong.
-I also really like the L'oreal Everstrong Sulfate Free collection. The deep replenishing masque is crizzy crack and smells delicious.

Derma E [cleansers and moisturizers]
C. Booth [face products, specifically the blue derma line]
Garnier [for hair and face products]
L'Oreal [hair and makeup]
Fresh [lip gloss, body wash, fragrances]
Korres [lip butter, lotion]
Mark [lip gloss, powder, fragrance]
Skinmilk [lotion & body cream]
Ecotools [brushes]
Eos [lip balm sticks/spheres]

I would link to all these, but I'm lazy. And of course there's my good friend google to assist you.

I still have a lot to discover, so expect a part II in a few months! Happy Shopping!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Zanna Roberts Rassi

Like a bawse.

hello. Meet my first ever style icon: Zanna Roberts Rassi. Her style is practically perfect and she also seems really sweet. Apparently she's a fashion editor at Marie Claire, so I guess that explains the former point. Although I shop and am familiar with more designers than your average Jane, I am not and have never been a huge fashion person. And I never seemed to come across anyone that displayed that classic, feminine yet edgy sense of style I've always been inherently drawn to. But then I came across Zanna [who was named one of 50 stylish New Yorkers over at], and was captivated by her impeccable Burberry trench [above] and casually cool pose. I was fitting to make Ms. Rassi a short tumblr blurb, but when I realized blondie had more than one swoonworthy look, it was decided she'd get a whole post devoted to her enviable sartorial expressions. I've said it time and time again before, and I will say it again now: Pimping is not easy... but it sure is fun. Woo-hoo! Enjoy.

This is very goddess-like.

So classic. And I'm a huge fan of the 70s style flares.

This a young look: NYC rocker chic.
Love this. Such a basic, cute, everyday outfit.

Louboutin flats. Well done.

Loving the various prints and textures and how it all still "works".

I need shorts like these ASAP. And the shoes too. The outfit is easy and A+.
And last but not least, the photo that caught my eye first. Oh yes.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Sex and the City part deux

Good picture of the squad. They don't look as dreadfully airbrushed in this one.
 They say not to address the haters, but what would be the fun in that? SATC often gets royally shitted on and the beef usually stems from the same handful of issues. Let's address what the naysayers so desperately want to know:

How can Carrie afford to party and bullshit 24/7?
Listen, I don't know how much a weekly newspaper column pays but let's look at the facts. The girl has a rent controlled apartment ($750) and is a small town celebrity in the small world better known as Manhattan. She also has a handful of successful and well-connected best friends and at least a decade of New York residency under her belt which means she has her footing and presumably other long-standing relationships in the city. And have you seen her body/build? The girl clearly doesn't eat much. I mean, she keeps sweaters in her stove. I think with all that being said it's safe to say her chump change and notoriety go pretty far. People who think you need hundreds to have a good time clearly aren't all that creative [or well-connected].

Why is the show drowning in a sea of milk?
Although people of color occasionally stepped foot on camera it was not a regular occurrence so I am making a fair assumption that all the bigwigs behind this show were white. I'm kind of glad colored cameos weren't commonplace for the simple fact that I wouldn't want the writers doing a hackjob of it. Plus we all know it would have been a damned if you do, damned if you don't scenario. Some people are just never happy, whether they're stereotyped or not. And lastly, as much as we want to think that white NYC career women run in diverse social circles, the truth is, they usually don't. Let's stop the kidding right now. Even my best white girlfriends have a tightknit crew of white counterparts that aren't going anywhere. They like to keep the main backstabbers in close quarters, nah mean?

Why does the show give off mixed messages about empowerment?
The show had to make their messages mixed because on any given day, most women have mixed feelings about what it means to be empowered! Most women don't know what the fuck they want, and I've never denied this. Ask a woman an emotion-based question on a random Tuesday and then during her period and you'll get two different answers. They don't know if they wanna stay home or raise the baby or go to work or get a nanny or do some gardening. I wish it weren't true, but women are batshit crazy, haven't you heard?

Why do these women only talk about men/sex/relationships?
A little while ago I tweeted "It is a little strange that four women with successful careers would never talk about their jobs, only men." But now that I think about it, the name of the show is clearly "Sex and the City", so those are the two elements that the topics will focus on. The title of the show is the premise! Imagine that. I'm sure there was more going on in these fictional characters lives but they zeroed in on the topic at hand. If there was a show called "Watch Lady Blue make hot beverages" you best believe you'd be watchin me get my lil teapot on a whole lot more than once.

Is Samantha a man?
Of course not, she's just a woman who likes to have a lot of sex and is unabashed in her love and pursuit of it. I've never met a woman like this though. What's that? You haven't either? Oh.

Why are four middle aged women fucking and traipsing the streets like they're 21?
Okay. See that I never figured out the answer to. And I find it really odd that they do that. I mean if they're doing all this galavanting in their 30s then what did they do in their 20s?! Study? Because if they partied just as hard in their 20s it baffles me that they've been on this road for like 15 years and yet still expect to find a man in those quarters. Honestly. Isn't that the definition of insanity? I mean I meet guys and socialize and hit the city hard like mad now and plan on continuing this awesomeness for at least another five unattached years... but when I'm 35? Naw. I'll be a home-owning single mom to an adopted Taiwanese baby while working feverishly on my third book. Also, me and little Ni-Hao will be regularly seeing the world. Oh yes. Bar-hopping and "networking" are cool and all that but I don't think my 35 year old feet will be down for heels and dating games anymore. I'll be rocking my snuggie, nursing my Asian babychildren [perhaps a Pinoy the second time around] and watching ancient Family Matters episodes. I'll be old then.

Why were the movies such horrible, cliched, shallow trash?
I'm kidding, nobody really said this [out loud], but I certainly wondered. They should have given up while they were ahead, and in my opinion, that was somewhere after Berger dueced Carrie and before she met the Russian. He gave me the utmost creeps from jump peering at Carrie all funny in the art gallery. Shoutout to Marina Abramović though! That's a real wild old lady.

Sex and the City part une

I love this picture. The movie[s] sucked though.

What is there to say that hasn't already been said about this iconic show? [For a quick background on the characters and all six seasons click here.] A lot of critics knock the show in their reviews, seeming slightly annoyed with its overwhelming popularity and its metamorphosis into a cultural phenomenon. So instead of ranting about the show [which I happen to think was supremely well done], I will share my thoughts on it and then address the oft repeated complaints of the SATC naysayers in part deux.

I think the show was very well done and believe it to be one of the sharpest portrayals of modern urban women to ever hit the small screen. I appreciated that the producers tried to make the womens' makeup and hair look self-done and their apartments look "lived in". I liked that many different NYC neighborhoods were showcased quite realistically and beautifully. The dialogue was fresh [thank Miranda for some of the best lines of the series], the scenery was realistic [Carrie's mismatched furniture and erratic looking apartment was spot on], and the characters were memorable [someone made mention that Carrie's trio of best friends reflected her personality, or even that of the average woman - which when you think about it is so true: we're all slutty, demure and cynical in our own ways]. I thought the experiences were accurate; from dating freak after freak in NYC, to commitment vs. constant crushing, to the one who got away, to the one who never was. To being heartbroken yet hopeful, to making hard and life-changing decisions, to saying I'm sorry, to giving people a chance. It was all there.

And at the risk of sounding crazy, the best match for Carrie was not the Russian [obviously too old and too cold], definitely not Big [too toxic and too detached] and certainly not Aidan [too good and too down to earth], but Berger. Berger was Carrie's most realistic match and I'm surprised nobody else caught that when they threw that in there. The poor sap was the male version of Carrie: marginally good-looking, a writer, neurotic, paranoid and hopelessly hung up on his ex. It's not surprising that he pussied out the way he did and that Carrie threw the fit that she did after. So truthfully, they'd never work because they were simply too much alike. But, that explains why Carrie was attracted to him to begin with.

Carrie was certainly a nut but I was surprised at how people criticized her since I've seen real-life women do crazier shit on a regular weekday. But bored people always have some shit to say. Anyway. She was very flawed but that made her refreshingly normal. I also peeped how they picked the least attractive actress [at least facially] to play the blond lead, and made the most attractive actress brunette and terribly irritating. That was an interesting take. My favorite characters were Carrie and Miranda obviously. As for men, I wasn't too keen on any of them except Aidan and Steve and even that's a stretch.

Of course there were unrealistic elements to the show, the tightly knit quad friendship being the main jarring one. For four successful and largely petty women, they always had plenty of time to meet up and hang out and never seemed to have any beef with one another. One could argue that these lunches were a priority though and that they preferred to put their differences aside rather than bicker about them.

What else? Most of the fashion was a hot ass unwearable mess. Samantha and Charlotte were underdeveloped characters and were so stereotypical it was hard to take them seriously. Charlotte and Miranda were both openly elitist with the brunette being more snobby and the redhead being more prejudiced. Miranda's marriage to Steve was terribly unrealistic - she would've stayed linked with the black guy [the foine but a little too pretty Blair Underwood] or just stayed a single mom. And Carrie and Big would have never married in real life either. Those two were just so bad for each other and could have never built a solid foundation on mere sexual chemistry and the shittiest level of communication on earth. Plus she was poor scraping by, he was loaded, he'd been divorced a zillion times already, Carrie wasn't much of a trophy, and she really only wanted him so he could upgrade her. Let's be real here. But who knows, maybe they had some maturity and real beating hearts underneath all those pasty wrinkles and unspoken words.

And shit, what do I know? I'm not in the business of selling dreams.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Future Wives

I just came across a fantastic article by Tracey McMillan called "Why you're not married". After I double-checked that it wasn't written by Terry McMillan of "Stella's groove went gay" fame, I decided to post an excerpt of it, so make sure you read the rest at Huffington Post. It's such a great reminder for women that they need to adopt a down to earth approach if they really desire marriage. It also pokes fun at the simpletons men, which always makes me giggle. I finished reading the article 10 minutes ago and I'm still on my feet applauding.

You want to get married. It's taken a while to admit it. Saying it out loud -- even in your mind -- feels kind of desperate, kind of unfeminist, kind of definitely not you, or at least not any you that you recognize. Because you're hardly like those girls on TLC saying yes to the dress and you would never compete for a man like those poor actress-wannabes on The Bachelor.

You've never dreamt of an aqua-blue ring box.

Then, something happened. Another birthday, maybe. A breakup. Your brother's wedding. His wife-elect asked you to be a bridesmaid, and suddenly there you were, wondering how in hell you came to be 36-years-old, walking down the aisle wearing something halfway decent from J. Crew that you could totally repurpose with a cute pair of boots and a jean jacket. You started to hate the bride -- she was so effing happy -- and for the first time ever you began to have feelings about the fact that you're not married. You never really cared that much before. But suddenly (it was so sudden) you found yourself wondering... Deep, deep breath... Why you're not married.

Well, I know why.

The problem is not men, it's you. Sure, there are lame men out there, but they're not really standing in your way. Because the fact is -- if whatever you're doing right now was going to get you married, you'd already have a ring on it.

The good news is that I believe every woman who wants to can find a great partner. You're just going to need to get rid of the idea that marriage will make you happy. It won't. Once the initial high wears off, you'll just be you, except with twice as much laundry.

Because ultimately, marriage is not about getting something -- it's about giving it. Strangely, men understand this more than we do. Probably because for them marriage involves sacrificing their most treasured possession -- a free-agent penis -- and for us, it's the culmination of a princess fantasy so universal, it built Disneyland.

The bottom line is that marriage is just a long-term opportunity to practice loving someone even when they don't deserve it. Because most of the time, your messy, farting, macaroni-and-cheese eating man will not be doing what you want him to. But as you give him love anyway -- because you have made up your mind to transform yourself into a person who is practicing being kind, deep, virtuous, truthful, giving, and most of all, accepting of your own dear self -- you will find that you will experience the very thing you wanted all along:


Monday, February 14, 2011

Blog World

The ubiquitous Gala Darling

Now that I've gotten comfortable with my role/title/position as a blogger, I got an idea to break down some of the other blogs I read. I visit a lot of different websites but there are very few I can count as favorites. I like people who can talk about everyday experiences and life in a frank, yet still refreshing way. I enjoy well rounded blogs [like mine], with topics that vary and a writing style that is honest, eloquent, and consistent. So here they are, in order of my favorite to my least favorite.

Penelope Trunk is a career blogger who often manages to mix her career advice and observations with frank and raw tales of her woes and current dilemmas. She has asperger's syndrome and although she is high-functioning, it's a topic she often discusses as a hindrance in her life. I say, who friggin cares, as she is one of the more intelligent and introspective bloggers out there. Her posts are so well-executed and thorough and there is such a humanity in her expression that is really beautiful. I feel like she has an interesting way of putting ideas together and all her written details become substantial components in helping the wheels in my head turn. I think she draws interesting conclusions about the world around us, and although some of her assessments aren't totally evident to me initially, a few seconds later I realize she's completely right. She has a pretty good handle on the working world and how all that shit works and I really appreciate that because I sure as hell don't.

I also like Decorno. I'm not a decor junkie or even interested in interior design like that, but I read because I just love her "Well, what the fuck is this?" tone and interesting observations. Plus her blog is short and punchy. [Usually.] And the decor-related stuff is often pretty eye-catching.

Gala Darling really isn't one of my favorite blogs for content but I check her page frequently because I feel like I can learn a lot from the empire she has built. Basically I see her as one of the few girls who's on top of the blogging game and therefore my direct competition. I highly doubt that even half of her income comes from her blog and I get a little sick of her manic pixie doused in cupcake scented glitter routine, but hey that's her shtick and it works on the impressionable minds of her naive readers. Now if only I could get you bastards to adore my incessant complaining the same way her crinolines eat up her sugar fairy exclamation points, I'd be set to go! I also heard she can be a bit callous and bitchy towards her fans in person and that's a major no-no in my book. Her carousels [her weekly round-up of interesting tidbits and links from all around the internet] are the only posts that I thoroughly enjoy.

IMBOYCRAZY is on my roster because Alexi Wasser is so hopelessly pathetic in the most adorable way. She's irritating and neurotic but completely harmless and her blind leading the blind posts are entertaining and the stuff of golden/genius dreams [I couldn't pick one!]. Those posts are akin to Gala's carousel posts [her weekly links from across the web round-up] and always keep me coming back. Also let me not forget that the girl has traffic out the wazoo, and one simple comment on one of her posts will easily garner me 25 hits the next day. No joke. Also, go LA!

Another LA blogger I read is this crazy bitch Coke Talk. I like her sparingly only because man if that bitch wasn't so open about being on something I could've surely predicted it. I mean her tagline is "Shady advice from a raging bitch who has no business answering any of these questions" so I mean, yeah. You can tell by the way she answers questions and her apparent life philosophies that she lives a privileged life, but only after going through some tough shit [she's hinted to a near death experience once or twice]. Although she is anonymous, I knew her type from jump. I'll bet money she's somewhere in her thirties [based on life experience alone] and white... but not just any Caucasian... she's definitely no wasp. Also the college degrees and the job somewhere high up in entertainment blah blah blah are clues. You're just not at that point in your twenties unless you didn't have any fun, and we know that bitch has had more fun than all the skeezers in 6 sorority houses combined. Although a little thesaurus heavy, a good portion of her advice is very pointed, necessary and spot on but the rest of it is like, okay bitch, go back to snorting lines and lying spread eagle on silk sheets in the Hollywood Hills somewhere. For humanity. Her appeal lies in the simple fact that this country is made up of cowards and she says the things that need to be said, often in a not so nice way. I read because her bluntness reassures me that some people's brains are still ticking, despite often feeling that the drugged-up slore is a hedonist trainwreck. She does have excellent taste in music and pretty things though. As a privileged bitch should.

So as far as bloggers, those are the only broads I can stand to read. I read The Glamourai here and there but I prefer blogs with more substance and her writing is far too sparse and elusive, and I sometimes read The Chloe Conspiracy but besides the cool outfits, I find her a bit annoying - she's kind of like a chihuahua. I read some other blogs for fun but a chuckle here and there does not a favorite make. I like some tumblrs but c'mon friends: That's not real writing and it never was. Speaking of tumblrs, check out mine! More BlueShame madness, just now bite-sized. Enjoy!

Blues Clues

So damn. I'm here typing up some goodness on upcoming blog topics when I realized it's been a few weeks since you guys have heard anything from me personally. Well. The past few weeks have been nutty as usual. Here's a snapshot:

I entered 2011 with a joy and zeal that was rare for me at this time of year, and I was genuinely excited about all the possibilities a new year could bring. The New Years rush had barely worn off when I was told I may have cervical cancer. The news brought me to my knees and shook me at my core, and I did what I always do in times of distress: talked it out and sat in bed pensively attempting to figure things out. It was weird. The reactions from people were weird. I sobbed. I was 22 years old, I couldn't die! And why now, when I was so optimistic about life? The news sent my family into a frenzy and my Dad came to the city from down South to visit me for a few days; I hadn't seen him in years. A few weeks later, I went back to the doctor for a follow-up and luckily the cancerous cells [although still present] have lessened. I go back in the summer to do some more tests and until then I am compartmentalizing this and staying busy. Hopefully the news is good so I can enjoy my summer, cause lawd knows I do love summer.

The marketing stuff I was doing for that t-shirt line was short-lived as the HNIC seemed more interested in potentially banging me versus effectively running his business. After lots of clashing over professional values and nonprofessional behavior, he suddenly decided the arrangement wasn't working out. Over text. And I mean it wasn't, after one inappropriate incident where he pressured me to have an in depth sexual discussion with him [that was when I went hulk, quit and then decided to "forgive" him after his profuse apologies], I was hanging on by a thread. Talkin about he discusses that with people all the time. *side eye* I'm not one of your homegirls heathen! Anyway, in the end I called him out for being a punk, promised him his business would fail [it will] and kept it movin.

As I dusted myself off and scrambled to find another gig, I wondered if that scenario would be one I would often face as a pretty girl attempting to make a name for myself. I figured it wouldn't be the last time I'd deal with sexual harassment, but I made a promise to never ever let a man get away with it, just as I had refused to this time. But now that I think about it, that wasn't the first time I'd had a sexual remark made toward me in a professional setting. I remember a French ex-boss I had spouting off something about me wearing an apron with nothing underneath and serving him coffee. That was truly the first time I'd encountered anything like that and I was pretty much stunned into silence. As for the second time, no dice.

In mid January, I started blogging for Peter Lik's blog [he's a world famous landscape photographer], and that has been going splendidly. Hopefully I'm not jinxing anything, but my editor is positive and very helpful and I am learning a lot. I am grateful for the opportunity!

It has been cold. Literally a blizzard every week since Christmas. So cold that a permanent move to LA or Miami has been a serious recurring thought in my head for weeks now. So cold and white that I have promised myself I will not be in New York at this time next year. I'm afraid I'm going to be buried in the inevitable avalanche that is to come. Not to mention I haven't gone out in weeks, and lemme tell ya, these legs are itching to crawl on top of a table somewhere so I can shake my groove thang. My social life has been killed by this weather. KILT. Zilch. Winter is a lone time round these parts. Save me. It's supposed to be 57 degrees this Thursday and I feel like celebrating! That was after I did a double take at the weather and exclaimed "Fifty seven degrees?!" as if someone had told me they had 57 Masters or something. I wish I was kidding. I'm fittin to take out one of my elegant spring dresses for this here occasion. Someone send me a ticket to LA. I beg you please.


Anyway what else is new... I have some HIRE ME info in my header now. You should peep that, because uh, honey would like to get hired. It's time to make my life happen, and there really is no better time than now. As far as relationships go, Twitter is still treating me good, we have an alright relationship. Facebook and I are on the outs, I barely see him anymore. And tumblr, well that's my latest fling that might turn long-term depending on what his progress is like. So far the communication is good. He gives me lots of ideas. And as far as real-life fleshly men, well I don't know any of those. Just a lot of boys, and some guys. No men around here.

I actually had a few guys spaz out on me recently, and usually I would take that with a deserving smile but these separate attacks were totally unwarranted and ego-driven and a bit scary. One guy kept taking jabs at my perceived arrogance and went on to ask "What have you accomplished that makes you so special?" To which I should have said "Well I for one, didn't have a kid out of wedlock with some broad I'm no longer with" but I didn't think it appropriate to offend his son or his babymama you see. So instead, I ended the conversation appropriately but before I knew it, he had posted a diatribe about me and "girls like me" on his facebook wall. And it was all really strange you see, because I had never met the guy and it was our first ever conversation. Another knight in shining armor did a lot of the same, calling me a smartass, and then proceeding to text me to tell me I wasn't shit after I blocked him on chat and facebook. And yet another gentleman told me that he would like to fuck me into submission which caught me so by surprise that I burst out laughing - later I would find out that he has a wife - what a lucky woman. Yeahhhh I don't give my number out to strangers anymore.

Oh and Happy Valentine's Day I guess? I forgot about that shit. Probably because it's more contrived than "reality" shows but yeah, enjoy your cheap chocolate and pellet filled teddy bears and make sure to keep up the "tradition" throughout the year. And if you really wanna show a girl some love, holler at my paypal account [via the donate button] over there. Thank you kindly!

Also does someone wanna help me with my header? Holla atcha girl, as it's probably the only hollering I'm welcoming as of now. That stale typeface needs a revamp. Until later, my friends!

p.s. - That new Gaga song "Born this way"... I dunno man. I just don't know. I don't wanna knock her but... nahhh man. Just nah.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Breaking Night

I just finished the book Breaking Night by Liz Murray and man! The only other time I can remember crying such fat, wet overpowering tears was when I read In the Time of the Butterflies by Julia Alvarez. Boy do I love a good story of trial, tribulation and trumping circumstance! [Or in some other cases, all out tragedy. I weep at the injustice. *tear*]. You can read the synopsis here.

I found myself frustrated in the beginning, where she talks a bit about her parents' beginning as well as her first few years of life. I was angry with her parents for their selfish, neglectful behavior. And it was wholly uncomfortable reading about the decrepit state of their home, the lice eating away at her tender scalp and the stench that emanated from her, so powerful that she hated going to school since it caused teasing. I was frustrated with the author for continuously abetting her parents and hopelessly seeking the love and comfort that never fully came. Her days at school were few and far between and as she got older she found refuge in running the streets with her neighborhood friends and the hot meals and tender loving care served up by their parents.

The story didn't hit home and get going for me until Chapter 6: Boys which caught our protagonist in the throes of first love as well as in a whirlwind of nomad-like moving and adjusting to new worlds and individuals. I was super intrigued by Carlos as I think we've all met a guy like him: smooth, kind, charming, but in the end; incredibly dangerous. I was struck by the fact that despite having an eerily similar upbringing he and Liz were ultimately different people, who seemed headed towards two entirely different worlds. Granted, I never forgot the fact that he was a Puerto Rican male and she was a white female, but in the end, the right [or shall I say better] choice was always there, the question was whether they'd take it.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Featured Talent: Qasim Basir

Qasim Basir
Film Writer/Director
30 years of age
New York City

“I think we can be better.”

Qasim and I met last Spring at TenJune and we have been buddies ever since.  Although we often bicker [probably because we're both Geminis and because I can never pronounce his name to his liking], we very much respect each other and often sincerely applaud each others talents. He has a great film coming out on February 11th, and I was delighted to interview him for BlueShame.

What do you like about your craft?

Everything! This is the best thing anyone could ever want to do [laughs]. I mean seriously, it's great. I want to say something important to this world. And I want that statement to live on and to potentially aid in making humanity better. Ultimately, that's the goal. I love to do it, number one, number two it's a huge opportunity, I mean I don't know if movies affect you as much as they have me, but for me they've had a tremendous effect on my life, on my views on certain things and introducing me to all kinds of ideas and such. So I would hope to do the same thing with the films that I create.

Writing is not necessarily appealing to me unless I'm going to see it come to life. It's not like I completely love writing for writings sake. I love it because I'm going to be able to make these images and this creation come to life and that for me is the greatest thing about it. That I can see it all the way from this creation of these characters in my mind to them actually coming alive on screen and speaking the words that I've put in their mouths. I write dramatic, socially relevant material. That's what I do, that's what I intend on doing throughout my career.

What was your first experience venturing into writing a screenplay or film-making? My first experience was an intro to film class when I was 16 teaching us the basics of making film. That's where I first knew that I really enjoyed this and potentially wanted to do this. At that time, it was like okay, this is an elective I could take, it sounds cool, lemme just try it. I mean I always loved movies, I mean I never even imagined that it was something that I would actually get into and do. I mean after that, I never thought that I could actually make movies for a living until there was something that happened to me and it changed my life, and I decided that I wanna do this for a living and I wanna do this for real. I made my first movie when I was 16, it was a short film, but I didn't get into it seriously until 2003. And at that time when my mind made that decision to take that class, somewhere up there, the big guy knew that I'd be doing this one day. This is something that… I think it was placed there for me for this particular reason.

Let's talk about what you're doing presently with your talent. As if I don't already know, but feel free to enlighten me.
Well I just made a movie called Mooz-lum, the movie is going to release in 10 major cities around this country on February 11th. We made an independent deal with AMC theaters in order to release this film in those cities, and this is gonna be a big thing for us, and it's a big thing for independent film in general because for the most part you've gotta go through a distributor, you gotta take these certain steps to get to theaters, but we didn't do that, we went straight to the exhibitor and it could be groundbreaking if successful. We feel very strongly about it and we have some good momentum going, especially online and it's a movie that is long overdue, a movie about this subject matter that depicts Muslims in this country more accurately than this sort of one sided extreme depiction that we've been getting over the past decade or so. I want people to know how important it is that we get the communities out to support this movie, because it's a completely independent effort, and the statement we could potentially make by this story being successful could be huge. And it's completely dependent upon how the people respond, and in the event that people come out and support, the film will open in more cities every week. Right now we're opening in 10 cities but there's huge potential to grow much more.

How long have you been working on this movie, from start to finish?
I initially wrote this script in 2007, but the thing about is that I wrote another script before this film in like 2005 and that film never got made because I never got funding for it. And when I wrote this script initially in 2007, I ended up combining this story that I was trying to get made along with the story that I was making, which was the story about Muslim Americans.
Mooz-lum is my first real, professional film with real name actors and stuff like that. I sort of combined those two journeys as well, so this movie sort of started in 2005, and it's up to the point it is now where it's coming out in a week and a half.

I think the message that I've gotten from this movie from the very beginning, as well as the social campaign is that, we really can't make it on our own. I'm not sure if you agree with that, but that's definitely the vibe that I've gotten.
I totally agree. We are talking about me this whole time but there have been some great people in my life to help me along the way to get here and even to get this movie made. My producers, and people around me, it's definitely a lot that goes into it.

I think it's a good message for, for lack of a better word people who are hustling, all the creative talents who are trying to be successful, and I think that's a really good message. Do you remember what it was like when this was all a dream?
Yeah! And that's the thing. I think people dream and it is just that, it's a dream. I'm here to tell people it is so doable. These dreams can be realized. But that work has to be put in, it just has to be, there's no way around it. And everyone nowadays just wants this quick fix and to make it and be famous and be on the red carpet and all that… with nothing behind it, no substance behind it. But this is tough man, and I mean we always see all these people out here that are famous and that have made it, but we never see the huge percentage of the people that do not. And the fact is, there's far more people that don't make it than do. And for me, I just think that people have to understand the implications of trying to do this kind of stuff and understand what it really takes and be willing to do that.

What does it take? Was it very difficult for you at some point? Did you wanna give up?
At some point?! It was difficult for me since I decided to do this. I don't come from money or anything so when you're out here trynna make something happen like this; I mean it was difficult from 2003 up until now. And now it's a different sort of struggle because I'm not like a starving artist anymore but from 03 to 09 it was basically that, I was literally like "Alright I gotta find some money to eat" and that's real, it's like a third of my entire adult life [laughs] up until I got this movie, it was just difficulty and struggling and broke and still trying to do this stuff while all this is taking place. But at no point in that whole process did I ever think that I would not make it. And I think that at the end of the day that kind of faith is necessary, and that's what I had was faith. I had faith in God, I had faith in myself, I had faith that this was what I was supposed to be doing. And that's why I say that people that want that quick fix I don't know if that's enough to sustain them through this fight. You gotta have something real. I'm inspired by higher power, I just am, I made a decision a while ago this is what I was gonna do, I made that decision because I feel like is what I'm supposed to do, there will be obstacles, there were and there will be more. 

What are some of your plans for the future?
I just started writing another script actually.

So this is definitely the beginning of the journey for you. I know Mooz-Lum The Movie is not the last thing I will see or hear from you.

For more info see:

Gone in 60 seconds

This is how a normal conservation can quickly turn ugly. [I'm in the blue]:

Lady Blue,

If you are interested in interning for me- please drop me a line later today.



347 000 0000

Christopher -
Thank you for your response. I checked out the website and it's really great, and quite witty. Is the internship paid at all? At this time I'm unable to work for free.
Thank you,
Lady Blue

Lady Blue,
The internship is unpaid, as the ad stipulated, and probably best for those individuals seeking college credits. Just for your edification, I also checked out your blog, and you really need a lot of direction and grooming.

When I say you would probably be receiving one of the best educations in media from one of the best bloggers in America (me) I am not kidding. I've paid the last 2 years through the nose getting to where I am, you on the hand would just have to give me 20 hours a week to get a stellar education and an eventual impressive portfolio (your current work is very pedestrian to be honest with a few sparks).
If you have any doubts, you can go to and see our stats, we get 5000 visitors a day, and about 400 000  hits a month.
If any of this inspires you let me know and I can help you ramp up your writing and perhaps within a year help you have a brilliant portfolio or at least a job with one of my competitors if not with us.

Christopher -
I will pass on the "opportunity". I'm not interested in working for free, especially for someone who believes that trashing my writing would provide me with any kind of incentive toward receiving an "education" from you.
I chose not to comment on the fact that S&V's articles are in dire need of an editor, choosing instead to focus on the fact that the writing was at best, witty. I don't care how many visitors you get a day, a week, month, whenever... you can't afford to pay anyone and you lack professionalism, decorum and humility. While the arrogance displayed on my site is in jest; yours is regrettably, not.
One of the best bloggers in America? Who are you trying to kid "Chrstphr"? Surely not me.
Lady Blue

I am going to publish this letter.
thank you

You can go ahead, I stand 100% by what I wrote. Don't make any edits either.

[EDIT: This just in!]
look for it tmrw Lady Blue. I appreciate your candor, as will our readers.